I was in my 30s and nothing was going well. I was working in a construction supply yard picking up trash for minimum wage. I thought I had a bright future, but everything seemed to go wrong somewhere.
I picked up this job at an agency and soon got a heavy duty vehicle (HGV) job as I had just gotten my license. But things got worse and worse! I had several crashes while driving on delivery jobs. I crashed into a bridge, a car and managed to drop someone’s hot sauce, a full pallet load, much to the dismay of the owners! That wasn’t my best day, nor his.
Things were conspiring against me, I thought. Wherever I went, devastation followed. My relationships were in shambles and my debt was growing. And it seemed like there was nothing I could do to change everything.
I had remembered seeing The Secret a few years earlier and losing patience with my efforts to ‘manifest’ the life of my dreams (in a week)! Maybe he was being too impatient! I knew there had to be something in it, so I decided to go back to the drawing board. I also quit my job. I had crashed twice for the same company and it was costing them per day! Just going back to the office made my skin crawl, knowing how useless it was!
Things had been better.
He owed me a lot and was paying the rent with a credit card. I was stressed all the time. That’s probably why things got out of hand.
I bought all the books I could find on the subject of the law of attraction. I soon found myself in a much better state of mind, despite all the troubles hanging over me. I took some work and started teaching martial arts classes, something that had been a passion for years.
The things I had given up appeared to help me get back on track. Years before I had trained to do stunts, but my self-esteem had dropped so low that I had almost dismissed it as a bad idea. I got a few jobs and was able to pay off most of my credit card debt in a period of about 6 months.
My girlfriend at the time left me. I was working on a movie when it happened. I went back to victim mode, but knew I had to stay positive. I was beginning to realize that my state was the most important thing and also my worst enemy.
Over the previous months, I’d read every book I could find that mentioned the law of attraction: Raymond Holliwell’s Working with the Law, Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich, Wallace Wattles – The Science of Getting Rich, As A Man Thinketh James Allen and so on.
All of these books taught the law of attraction and explained it in much more detail than is explained in the movie The Secret. In the movie The Secret, it is explained how thoughts become things. When I saw the movie for the first time, I was inspired, but I didn’t quite understand it. I thought I understood it, but it was only superficial. I watched my thoughts and dreamed of what I wanted, but somehow things I didn’t want kept coming up.
Turns out, it wasn’t as positive as I thought! Despite spending a few hours meditating and visualizing what a great life I would be having, it became clear later that I was spending the rest of my time complaining and worrying. It is not useful when you are trying to attract the wonderful life.
The problem was that my life was a concern (for me)! I was concentrating on what was, not what could be. So I kept reinforcing old behavior patterns and creating “things” to complain about.
Despite the short break from work, I was unable to devote my time to any kind of enjoyment. It always defaulted to my worry, state of mind, and overwork in some way. My only escape from this constantly revisiting state of mind was to get drunk whenever the opportunity presented itself.
Of course, this did not help my mood or my bank balance. Whenever I stopped drinking, my life seemed to improve dramatically. I had money, the job came, and things got better. But with the constant worry and obsession with the need for a more secure source of income, in addition to having a lot of free time, I would inevitably find myself back in alcohol!
When I finally realized this pattern that I was creating, things started to change. I found an online tutoring program and learned how to market my kung fu school more effectively, as well as how to build an online business. This gave me something to focus my restless mind on, which is what I desperately needed.
Having the right people in my life now is completely invaluable. I realized that I had separated myself from people and was spending a lot of time alone. This in itself led to depression and anxiety. However, my connection to the online community meant that I was able to network and meet in person with other like-minded people. There was an online resource for connecting through social media and I started meeting people in my local area.
By using what I believe to be the Law of Attraction, I have managed to escape the 9-5 jobs that I hated so much, break out of the rut, and overcome lack of confidence, fear, and panic. Now I can work from home and teach martial arts without a job, a boss, or answering to anyone. It wasn’t easy, but if I can do it, you can too!
What do you think about the law of attraction? Will you take the red pill or the blue pill? Take the blue pill and the story ends, wake up in bed and believe what you want to believe. Take the red pill and you stay in wonderland and you will see how far the rabbit hole goes …